Life in America has been ruined by the fact Americans want anything they want, availible 24 hours a day! Look no further than the emergence of 24 hour availability to mirror the demise of the household! It used to be reserved for truck drivers and people who worked the grave yard shift to have a rocky household, due to the fact they just weren’t there!
90% of the time marriages fail because 1 party was not feeling wanted any longer. Finances play a big role as well, but even then an abandonment strategy can be the method used to escape. It is not the sudden “oh I tripped into an affair” scenario it’s usually a slow smoldering flame that turns into a forest fire, but within that person, not outwardly displayed.
I mean the signs are visible, but the spouse is so busy with other things, they don’t recognize the neglect they ate representing to their mate. Both parties are victims in this situation though. The 1 feeling neglected has the guilt of “it’s all in my head” syndrome & the offender sees nothing wrong, so they are blind to the fact the whole thing is crumbling.
That is unless they don’t care, and the blindness is only tactical move to make the other party feel alienated enough to wonder off, and seemingly destroy a marriage, when really that was the disinterested spouses whole plan! Devious as it may sound, it’s definitely possible.
People live life not to make waves, and to avoid conflict, we have become so good at it, cowardly actions are celebrated and rewarded like Oscars. The most cowardice you are, will equate to your innocence. “Communication is the key” is touted as a slogan like “where’s the beef?” or “made in the USA” but the truth is the devil resides in the details!
A person can only talk about something so many times, you can only display displeasure, or malice in so many ways, before it falls on deaf ears! No one is listening, but that’s not just a regular “no one” it’s the only 1 that matters, your soul mate, your life partner, the person who said “through sickness and health, for richer or poorer” that person is not listening so what now?
Yes your starving. Starving for attention, needing affection, needing commitment, but you feel as if the person who breaths life into you, is some how keeping you on life support and you feel like they may pull the plug at any moment. What then? What’s next? I don’t know. What I do know is adultery is not the answer! That other 10% that’s left is usually not a bounty placed to ignore or willfully run you off, it’s full of enigmatic reasons, and massive amounts of fear, confusion & doubt. It’s not there to make you leave, and feel as if you’re not loved or desired it’s there to be a buffer, a blanket covering the head of discontent, how do you get under that blanket?
Well there’s the challenge. In closing I will say this there’s still a small chance that 10% is the cowards cut. The tool used to reward that person, with freedom from those vows, if you are curious just pay closer attention to your whole relationship the evidence is right there, but don’t make it easy on the coward, make them sweat it out and represent themselves as they should, never allow yourself to be the donkey at the Derby!
Goals….. Everyone has some. Everyone wants some. Everybody needs some. The problem is to accomplish a Goal you have to fight. You have to struggle. You have to suffer. Accomplished is what we want our Goal to be. But before we can get there we have to at least begin! The fear of failure usually stops us in our tracks, like a speeding train and we are frozen waiting to be smashed! Goals are great once they gain the status of Accomplished, but the journey from Goal to Reality is a road paved in pain, sacrifice, blood sweat, and tears! But isn’t it worth it?
“People are so worried about the lives being lived on their screens, they neglect the lives being lived right next to them!”
The newest debate in America is the Syrian Refugee crisis, or better yet what to do with them! If you are a Caucasian American at a lower education level and/or lower income level, then you are most likely saying “not in my MERICA!” Whether it is the fear of what happened in France or the brain washing from Donald Trump which is hate talk disguised as security measures for America! Most less educated Caucasian bigots or semi-bigots look to successful Caucasian people for leadership, which is why the message is so successful right now among the low income and under-educated Caucasians in America.
On the other side of the tracks the lower educated and lower income African Americans are still protesting against the police. Whether it is those still upset about Ferguson, or the Eric Garner murder, Baltimore, Cleveland, Florida, East Texas, or Chicago there’s plenty of mad black people to hold signs and picket all day long to go around! Protesting some bad actions by some bad people, but also condemning a whole American establishment that has a history of mistreating blacks in America, but also enriching plenty of black lives in America as well. Yes, I know there are a lot of higher educated, and higher income blacks marching too, but they are really marching to make more money or just to say they were there it is a social media trophy to sit on their mantle or badge to post on their Facebook page!
The biggest thing both of these groups of people refuse to admit is while they see both these issues as big problems, they completely hide from accepting the responsibility when the very things they fear from either “Refugees” or “Police Officers” is being committed by their very own neighbors and fellow counter parts of their own communities!
Caucasian Americans have committed random acts of terrorism in America than any Syrian, Iranian, or Saudi combined and multiplied, although they don’t call it terrorism even though that’s exactly what it is Domestic Terrorism!
African Americans want justice for everyone from Trayvon to Tookie in most case these victims are actual criminals! It’s unfortunate the Trayvon Martin’s get lumped in with the Freddie Gray’s! All the while we hold no African Americans who kill, steal, and destroy our own communities responsible for anything and expect the police to keep us safe!
See both communities have the wrong cure for the illness, the disease that’s killing the country we all love. Caucasian Americans think boycotting the refugees and leaving them no choice but to join ISIS/ISIL/DASH because poverty and starving children really leave a lot of them no choice, and only enforce the terrorist message. African Americans feel like even though we show very little regard for our own race, that everyone else should worship our very existence! We refuse to forget that even though we may pay some taxes etc… that we still have a responsibility to work along side the police to help root out the evils in our own community!
The truth about a lot of the refugees are unlike a lot of illegal aliens, refugees, or temporary workers already here in America from all over the world, these refugees are educated in most cases in technology and healthcare, science and humanities. We are not accepting a lot of uneducated laborer class people, who only desire to weigh down the government welfare system, we are actually importing a lot of doctors, scientists, and technology industry workers.Let us not forget they already have strong Middle Eastern communities here in America to join, which mean similar minded people ready to help them get on their feet, and get the ball rolling.
Honestly I think that is where a lot of the fear stems from, when hate speak comes from the higher educated and higher income Caucasian Americans. They know the refugees represent more competition in the medical care and technology workforce, no not nurses etc.. but pharmaceuticals and tech start up companies! For the few decades a lot of talk about immigration reform has been surrounded by the lettuce picking Mexicans and Hispanic workforce, but in reality the real goal was for the tech community to get smarter people in from over seas to work cheaper for longer and dangle the green card over their heads as incentive! The import of refugees will help alleviate the Silicon Valley under educated issue, at the same time will offer direct competition to a lot of small start up companies fighting for funding from the tech billionaires and any one else looking to get a foot in the door of the next Facebook, Twitter, etc…
In both cases we as Americans Caucasian and African American need to stop the hypocritical rhetoric that says that all Muslims are terrorist and all police are racist bigots! We need to realize that a lot Caucasian people have small military type arsenals that could overthrow a lot of smaller governments in a surprise coup. The fact that we can go buy any number of assault rifles, hand guns, and small munitions this weekend across the country at any number of gun shows who bank off the fear mongering political talk, which continues to bankroll their pockets! A mass shooting happens any where in the world, and gun sales go up, regardless whether its Columbine or Paris this is a fact!
African Americans need to realize in order to make their lives better, it is time to debate turning in their cousin who has been selling drugs for years assisting the killing of their community the whole time. You know who the killers are, you know who the defacers are but no one is willing to speak up and do anything about it.When your car is stolen, your house is robbed the first call you make is to the police, but when he shoots the assailant you want to protest the police, something has to change! In the situations where the bigots are on the police force and in public office, we need to accept the responsibility to change the situation from the inside, step up and join the force, or become a council person etc.. hell go to a council meeting! Your concerned about closing public schools in your community, show up for parent teacher conferences 2 years before the school is determined to be under performing! We are preaching about the “Preschool to Prison Pipeline” but that starts at home, train your child to be a promoter and not a problem, but that means the parents have to step it up as well! Sign up for PTA, volunteering opportunities, etc… be a part of the community! We need to realize drugs are transforming from illegal to legal and the profits are amazing, instead of smoking it we need to start growing it! Relocate pool your money and get in the game!
These 2 dilemmas are different but at the same time pretty similar, both are a result of 2 communities looking for someone to blame for their own shortcomings! Allowing themselves to be guided by people who look smarter, or yell louder than they do or can! Many Americans of both races and all political affiliations are looking for leaders to follow, when the real impact happens right at our dinner tables, whether it be a four or more seats or a wood crate behind the local super market either way change is made at home on the first level of social responsibility! Our homes are the first place we have the opportunity to prevent the next Sandy Hook or Ferguson from even happening on our watch! We must learn and then teach to love and be responsible for our own actions and teach our children the same things! You don’t want your son to shoot up a church in South Carolina, then you must teach him it is wrong to hate based off color and religion, and if you don’t want your child in handcuffs at 7 years old he must know that school is a place to learn and excel, not a place to display his built up anger and frustration because his parents aren’t engaging in his life!
America is the greatest country on earth period! We as its citizens must realize that for ourselves because everyone on the outside already does! They may grow up hating us, but when given the opportunity to become a citizen, they indulge and bask in the greatness of our Constitution, Freedom and Independence they learn our laws and amendments and use them to their advantage. They take advantage of the foundation what America is built on, and adopt our Plymouth Rock, American Pride reborn and reformulated!
What are you going to do next?
What is the next thing on your agenda?
The government and states are going to stop funding social and public welfare programs, so whats your plan?
See pretty soon the people who are depending on food stamps, section 8, childcare assistance, and any social welfare program are going to be s.o.l. (shit outta luck) because the people in the middle class are tired of paying for the poor to live better than they do!
The generations of people who have lived in public housing projects as long as they can remember back in their memory are disappearing. But not because the people have decided to finally pull themselves up from the bottom, instead it is because the cities are recognizing there are opportunities for profit in the areas which these housing projects are occupying space. Whether is the gentrification efforts and example of say Brooklyn and Harlem, or the fact the projects are down town and stifle income that could be coming from high-end buyers like in Home town of Louisville, Ky. The housing projects are coming down! When Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans they kicked people out the projects that hadn’t even been hit by the storm or flooding, and some 8 years later they are still empty.
Every year states do more cutting to social welfare projects, and quality of life projects are being underfunded The government has waged a war on any assistance for any of the programs and it is not just the Tea Party candidates that support the non-funding it is the traditional GOP candidates, as well as a small majority of Democratic politicians that have mixed districts that are tired of their tax dollars going to the poor and lower-income communities and never returning to their own districts. The time of the person getting on public assistance and staying there in that same financial state is over!
See I know I sound like the boy who cried wolf, but I am seeing it more and more everyday. From a perspective of a man and father who pays his own bills, taxes and buys my own groceries and pay my own rent. Also the people I associate with are doing the same as well. We are getting pissed off, and tired of supporting the people who choose not to work hard and limit themselves to just enough productivity so things don’t get hard on them.
We are tired of the fact we go to the mall and see them there, buying all the Jordan’s, buying all the Coach, and Dooney bags. They wear the finest clothing articles they can, because they have no idea that they are just walking “I am on welfare bill boards” because their children are bad as hell and unkempt even though they have on name brands they aren’t even taking care of. The looks on their faces as they pass the Gap Store, and Banana Republic store because their clothes are too tight, and make them look like they are trying to be like white people.They congregate in the food court to eat California Pizza Company, and Panera, while their children scope and go around collecting bourbon chicken from the Chinese people and free chicken samples from Chik-Fil-A. When it is all said and done they all pile into a pretty nice looking car and drive back to the projects, or the rent adjusted apartment or housing areas they live in. And of course there are those who still sit at the bus stop with all their children to catch the bus with Macy’s, Dillard’s,Finish Line,and Footlocker bags.
Not to mention when we the hard-working tax paying citizens, go to the grocery store we are tired of seeing the people there with 2 and 3 carts full of food purchasing everything we would like to eat but can’t even afford to buy. Their baskets are filled at will, with no real thought of price. The grocery isn’t really making more than they previous did, because the food manufacturer is reaping the benefits, because they just inflate their prices. The food stamp recipient is giving the store and the manufacturer the bulk of their profits, and since food stamps are free from the government the recipients are complaining about having to spend a little more than they did the last week. So basically what we have is a situation where the stores and he food manufacturer have a contract with the government.
Now when it comes to any of the programs that are offered by the states such as child care assistance, the states just simply can’t afford it! Period! That is when they have to come to the tax payer hat in hand and we are saying NO! Because we have to pay full price for day care, and schooling. The rates are so absorbent that it cost more than some people’s mortgages and car payments for the month! Which are fostered because the government has been offering so much assistance, the facilities are guaranteed payment so they can charge what ever they feel! So there you go another situation where the private business is depending on the government to basically pay its bills. In doing so it hurts the regular everyday American just trying to make it!
Now I know what I am saying hear sounds harsh and insensitive, and I want it to! I have been on public assistance in my life time off and on, as a child and even messed with some women who schemed it as an adult. The major reason I am not on it now though is because of PRIDE! I was raised with it, my mother only used public assistance when it had gotten so bad we needed too, and once our rough patch was over she got off it. She told the truth about her wages, and how much she and my father was making, it was a sense of pride that we didn’t have to be on food stamps and public housing. Even though life was hard and I didn’t have much or anything I may have wanted, I always knew I was going to have what I needed. She depended on God and herself, not even my father too much just to make sure there were no disappointments. “Pull yourself up, by your bootstraps!” & “Only person you can depend on is you!” Are 2 of here favorite sayings! All though life was not perfect, we were never dirty, beaten, or battered! With that said yes you might have on some thrift store clothes, shoes from the Salvation Army store, and a coat from the DAV (Disabled Veterans Store)store, It was going to be clean, and so was you!
That is what is missing from life now, that need to be proud of who you are and the sense of supporting yourself. So what you may have to eat hot dogs and pork and beans, or you may have to pass on the lunch with friends, because you just aint got it, but at least you know your not begging, or being taken care of by everybody else. To settle for welfare and just stay stuck is pathetic and immature! Yes, I know you say “well I am going to school!” but whats next? Your schooling should be over in a max of 4 years, now you gonna get a job, you ain’t worked in 4 years, plus if you in school and not working why do you need so much day care and food stamps? Be responsible stop having all these children by these men who can’t and/or aren’t going to help you raise them! Doesn’t the child that is being born deserve at least that much?
In closing all I am saying is pretty soon the free ride is going to come to an end at the station because there is no way America can continue this way. The next civil war is going to be a war of class, not race. The government is going to side with those that bring the most to the table, not the people who are always sitting there eating off it!
The main issue is the lack of communication! It is a skill that people in relationships lack all over the country, but I feel like it is especially an issue in the lower financial class, and under educated households. Communication is a natural and nurtured reaction and skill. I say it is both nature and nurture driven because yes some people are just great communicators, but the way they choose to communicate is just as important as the act itself.
In a lot of relationships both sides bring baggage and the lack of effective communication is 1 big suitcase that people lay on their mate’s emotional floor! Plus if a person has not seen an effective relationship where communication is vibrant, successful, respectful, and integral then they are most likely to bring that broken style of communication into their relationship as well. The faults of cheating and revenge, and spite are all acted out in most cases because people refuse to just admit they have made mistakes, or feel a certain way about the transgressions of their mate, yet they don’t know how to tell them verbally, so they act out instead.
A simple talk about financial stress and feelings of not want and abandon can be resolved by both parties sitting down and discussing the when’s and why’s of their relationship saving them from committing crimes of the heart against the other person, because they are to filled with the anxiety, embarrassment, and fear they are filled with when they think of just talking about their feelings. This issue is not just a man’s problem; it is a sickness and disease both sexes have.
Men call it pride and foolish terms such as “me being me”, and “this is what men do” when they are explaining their childish behavior, and their inability to talk and effectively communicate their feelings. Mainly because they weren’t shown an image of a man even doing that for a fear he would be conceived as weak or gay!
Women on the other hand have no issue with discussing their emotions and issues with their friends, family, and strangers, but when it comes to their mate they clam up on the true important matters and focus on trivial things that the man has no idea of why it even matters! Which cause a void of trust and faith and opens the door for lies and deception on both part, yet their mothers and girlfriends will know the whole scoop! Their childish behavior is brought on by a fear of being alone, and missing out on “a good thing” because if they just show a man the image they think the man thinks he wants to see, then he will never leave them. Even though we all know this is false.
Honest and truthful communication a clean slate and realizing not all issues have resolutions that are prevalent and immediate, but if the issues are on the table then they can be worked on and ironed out between both parties, as long as they are committed to doing so and bringing all issues to the fore front can only relive stress, and avoid ignorant and permanent damage effecting all sides of people physically and emotionally! It will also break the mold of ineffective communication for your children because they will see how adults are supposed to handle life amongst each other, and in business dealings as well. Effective and decisive communication builds confidence and integrity in people, and also shows a person’s worth in way that is immeasurable.
Gadhafi’s death and Iraq war ending, coincidence?
I don’t think so I think the real situation is now since America has spent more than a BILLION dollars getting rid of Moammar, we have made it clear to whoever is running Libya that we want that oil!!!! There are no coincidences in America when it comes to money, resources, and regime change America, France, and Italy are going to share the wealth of the oil which Libya is holding causing a backlash between them and the tag team of Russia and China! Hold your breath this should be a good fight!
Tupac Shakur’s image and vision of his “Thug Life” mentality, was not the perverted and massively distorted vision and oxymoron that Bob Dole and Dolores Tucker made it to be instead he was really reaching out too and talking to the single parent home, the hungry, the under and uneducated, unemployed, the downtrodden, and the forgotten American whether he/she be black, white, or brown! Unfortunately his image and legacy is one consumed by ignorant and confused people who only saw the raw un-molded, uncut, confused and mislead young man who was actually the Next evolutionary figure in the battle for Civil Rights!
His aim was too picked up where his mother and other Black Panther leaders left, his message delivery was just, as if not more powerful than the quiet and peaceful marches and respectable manners for which Martin won our freedom as a race, but where Tupac differed is he didn’t have the respect, honor, and social acceptance as Martin eventually earned.
Instead it was a brash, young angry, and uncontrolled message that couldn’t be caged his fury and power wasn’t like that of Garvey and Malcolm X who both led with honor, dignity, and control. Instead Tupac’s audience had no guidelines or outline for success they had no road map to change they just knew where they was, and where they didn’t want to be. Tupac’s guidance was too influenced by the street life he saw, and also by the street life that the record producers, and record companies wanted to make sure got across because it was making money!
So instead of the millions listening to his message of revolution against the white people, and the Government his message came across like he was saying revolt against anyone that has more than you, including each other! Unfortunately that’s where it all went downhill, because the ignorance and laziness of poor people, along with the guile and sneaky intelligence of the Jews and other foreign music and movie companies he was guided to put a cage on his real message and make music that these fools and women wanted to listen to!
The reason I call Tupac the “bridge” is because Martin’s no violence and peaceful message had done all it could do for the African! Once the South was assumed to be “free” and Jim Crow was publicly outlawed, (though we know some still kept it as law) the fight for Martin was moved to the North were many of the blacks fled whether it be Oakland California, or Chicago Martin realized his job was still incomplete!
As Martin came into these new places were blacks were now living amongst the secret code of Jim Crow aka “James Crow” he wasn’t being ran out-of-town or locked up by the local sheriff. No see they had a better smarter, craftier way to deal with him, they instead welcomed him to their city. Because they witnessed how being violent didn’t work in the South it only created a picture that displayed blacks as the victim and the oppressor was the White man, well these images and characteristics would only deliver sympathy and rouse some of the soft white people’s heart-strings to feel a guilt for the black mans situation!
A bigger enemy to the black mans survival in the North was also present The Immigrant! The immigrant all though he wasn’t American and didn’t lift a hand to build America like the Africans did with their blood, sweat, and tears, they mostly fit in because they looked the same as Americans, they were white! Since this was the norm for them their only discrimination’s came down to each other and it was mostly religion based. The immigrant was already in the North working the good jobs in manufacturing and processing and the black just had to take the customary low wage and fill in for strike pay type of jobs. The major issue here is the immigrant didn’t have the same white guilt the American white had for the Negro considering they were already considered to be better than the black when they stepped off the boat. They were able to form unions and they owned neighborhoods and communities they were the policemen and secretaries, the firefighters, and the lawyers, judges, and prosecutors by the time the black man got up north they even had the crime market on lock.
These were the rules and the way of life. With this already being set as the standards on how cities were going to be ran the politicians which came from these immigrant homes and communities didn’t have to worry about fighting Martin L. King and his black marchers being an issue or a real impact because they knew the old style communities would fight the battle for them. See what I am saying is the no violence approach to civil rights wasn’t and didn’t work in the North because in many cases the white skinned, and olive-skinned people in the north weren’t the same white people who brought Negros from Africa on boats and whipped and made us slaves. No these fair complected people have no connection with blacks and only know that they can dance, and sing but besides their strong back and refusal to fight back for their own rights they felt as if they were better than them from the beginning. See the plight to America from a foreigner’s point of view was a new chance on life, freedom religious, and other wise they had fought in their own civil wars in their homeland and new that America could be a new way to fortune and a great place for their children and their children’s children to grow up and live great dominate lives. In this reality of differences is where I think was the Jewish, Polish, Italian, Scottish, Irish, and German immigrants major trifle and therefore argument with the African-American.
I think they saw a weakness and laziness in the fact that this whole nation of Africans had allowed themselves to be slaves and allowed their children to be enslaved as well. The bigger fact and more evident product of slavery isn’t the physical aspect of it, it is the mental slavery in which my beautiful race still allows itself to hold it hostage! We haven’t broken the mental constraints of stepping out on our own, trusting and believing in each other, and putting ourselves first before anyone else!
This was more a of a brain dump for me at times it was all over the place and times it hit dead on, check it out and tell me where it guided your thoughts!