90% of the time marriages fail because 1 party was not feeling wanted any longer. Finances play a big role as well, but even then an abandonment strategy can be the method used to escape. It is not the sudden “oh I tripped into an affair” scenario it’s usually a slow smoldering flame that turns into a forest fire, but within that person, not outwardly displayed.
I mean the signs are visible, but the spouse is so busy with other things, they don’t recognize the neglect they ate representing to their mate. Both parties are victims in this situation though. The 1 feeling neglected has the guilt of “it’s all in my head” syndrome & the offender sees nothing wrong, so they are blind to the fact the whole thing is crumbling.
That is unless they don’t care, and the blindness is only tactical move to make the other party feel alienated enough to wonder off, and seemingly destroy a marriage, when really that was the disinterested spouses whole plan! Devious as it may sound, it’s definitely possible.
People live life not to make waves, and to avoid conflict, we have become so good at it, cowardly actions are celebrated and rewarded like Oscars. The most cowardice you are, will equate to your innocence. “Communication is the key” is touted as a slogan like “where’s the beef?” or “made in the USA” but the truth is the devil resides in the details!
A person can only talk about something so many times, you can only display displeasure, or malice in so many ways, before it falls on deaf ears! No one is listening, but that’s not just a regular “no one” it’s the only 1 that matters, your soul mate, your life partner, the person who said “through sickness and health, for richer or poorer” that person is not listening so what now?
Yes your starving. Starving for attention, needing affection, needing commitment, but you feel as if the person who breaths life into you, is some how keeping you on life support and you feel like they may pull the plug at any moment. What then? What’s next? I don’t know. What I do know is adultery is not the answer! That other 10% that’s left is usually not a bounty placed to ignore or willfully run you off, it’s full of enigmatic reasons, and massive amounts of fear, confusion & doubt. It’s not there to make you leave, and feel as if you’re not loved or desired it’s there to be a buffer, a blanket covering the head of discontent, how do you get under that blanket?
Well there’s the challenge. In closing I will say this there’s still a small chance that 10% is the cowards cut. The tool used to reward that person, with freedom from those vows, if you are curious just pay closer attention to your whole relationship the evidence is right there, but don’t make it easy on the coward, make them sweat it out and represent themselves as they should, never allow yourself to be the donkey at the Derby!